Why are online naturists so sensitive? It seems that one is unable to comment, compliment or criticize, positively or otherwise, without unleashing a barrage of hurt feelings and umbrage. It's a bit like trying to have a relationship, online or otherwise, near a raw hedgehog.
Me: "I don't like it when you say you like her pussy, I find that rude."
Them: "Well, other people say worse things and I find you rude too, so fuck you!"
Me: "You know, maybe all the women here don't want to be 'friended' by all the men, perhaps they appreciate some compliments but if someone else has already said it, perhaps you don't need to repeat it?"
Them: "Don't tell me what to do, I'll friend who I like, so fuck you!"
Me: "It seems to me you might benefit from a little quiet time, and perhaps disengage from inter-acting with other site users in such an antagonistic manner for a while, maybe take a short break."
Them: "You don't like me? I'm off then, fuck you!"
Me: "I'd like to encourage you to offer feedback into the process here, rather than go off on a one-man avenging-angel mission against the people you don't like."
Them: "That's the problem here, you're the problem, fuck you!"
Me: "Do you think you could try to behave like an adult here, and we could enter into polite non-discriminatory dialogue/debate of some kind?"
Them: "Fuck you!"
I think I must be missing something here…
Still "standing by' those comments!!!!!!!!
It is a lack of Wisdom. It's the same attitude as driving down the street with your windows rolled up in your car on the road and screaming at oeople behind the safery of the car glass. Everybody for drives faster than you is an idiot and everyone who drives slower than you is a moron. Anonymity gives people boldness to be jerks. Nobody would ever tell you those replies in a social situation because there are social rules in physical society. On the internet people can be jerks with almost no consequence.
With women in Naturism too much negative attention with harrassing exists in my opinion. Most naturists agree with that but as in Life, things are always spoiled by just a few people who think rules dont apply to them. They havent recognized wisdom yet.
Too easy to react on line. Just type and post think later. Road rage online rage. Some just need to chill out on a nudebeach for real sometime or sometimes
Unfortunately this person confuses naturism with sex , they would be more suited to another type of Internet site naturism is about feeling free to wear clothes or not on here we choose not to ladies have the right to be here for this reason also and should not have to read these sort of comments,when naked we are at our most vulnerable for all sorts of reasons therefore due respect should be shown to both sexes I will continue to compliment the beautiful and friendly ladies I have found here and of course the men too
I must write (say) that at Cobblers Beach when there WERE any 'onlookers' above they were chased away. When I used to go there quite often I felt comfortable. At River Island, I only once experienced a time when someone needed to be given their money back and sent on their way. Yes. Thannual carnivals seemed to attract some 'onlookers" up above. (I so hope the novelty wore off and they were either bored or converted.) I see those who benefit from selling the cover-up gear a little bit more as the opponent than the poor old per…….onlookers.
… wer sich liebt wie er ist, innen wie aussen, der liebt auch alle anderen… fur mich ist der Ausdruck wohlwollend adäquater als respektvoll. Den wohlwollend muss nicht bewerten und Respekt hat fur mich auch etwas mit Macht zu tun, darum respektiere deine Umwelt wohlwollend, dann hast du da auch Platz. 🙂
gruess roger
Respect is key and it goes both ways. Common sense is an obvious stuff too. Now, people are all different, so keep smiling and stay naked!
Yes john, I agree, we ARE all still learning so DON'T PANIC and be sure you know where your towel is.
As Joanne said: let us be humans first before we become naturists. And that means respecting each other.
This has nothing to do with being naturist of course. Adopting a naturist lifestyle doesn't magically make you a better person, but an already nice person does become a "better" naturist imo. There's very little inhibition online to behave rudely and the anonymity an avatar offers is just too good an opportunity for some people to pass, they need to feel some power they lack IRL I guess.
We are in the naked people world….unfortunately that will attract some 'weirdo's'..!! I have seen a lot of comments on here that make me cringe…!!! People that use sexually seggestive language should be removed…
And, we should not worry about those people removed from here..they will not be living on the streets..there are plenty of sites they can move to(and are probably already on)that would love their attitudes…I personally do not want to see it on here…..
Agreed!
However, for me it's a bit like history repeating itself. (Different naturists involved.) And I would not mind some stricter rules at all. I've known you by reputation for a long time now. I'm sure participants here would respect your judgement.
This is a very thought provoking subject Richard. It clearly arouses very strong emotions. I think that people are prepared to say things in a virtual environment that they would NEVER say face to face. This is both a blessing and a curse. In the few weeks that I have used this site I have talked to more people that I see share my views on nudity than ever before. On the other hand I am alarmed at some of the comments that are made and on the feeding frenzy that follows a posting from any newbie female. The internet is a new phenomena and it is my belief that it will take some time for us to properly be accustomed to it. A similar example is perhaps the motor car and road rage. We don't seem to see a pavement based equivalent perhaps because we have been walking for centuries. I guess my message to all concerned is DON'T PANIC WE ARE ALL STILL LEARNING.
To quote Maggie Smith, "Vulgarity is no substitute for wit." An idea that some would be better off keeping in mine. So why then do some invariably resort to that?
I was raised in the South and manners were, at that time, paramount, part of the glue that holds society together. It is the outward manifestation of respect for others.
When a person is called on the carpet for whatever reason, sometimes that person resorts to vulgarity. They are merely manifesting their insecurity. I believe deep inside they know they have broken some rule and don't have the gumption to admit the wrong. Usually they have not the wit to defend themselves any other way. I find that rather sad.
"Respect." It is a simple seven letter word but too often it is found lacking, if not non-existent, in online communities. Name calling and short circuiting discussions with recourse to two syllable slurs must be called out. Tolerance and a belief in free expression and open discussion need not evolve into masochism. If they do then the attraction and value of this forum will evolve to where they become extinct.
We need not, should not, be required to share values, interests, likes, fears and phobias. Difference, mental and physical, is what makes our species ever engaging, challenging and enlightening. However our differences should never be the basis for losing sight of what we should share: respect for one another.
Richard, Please do not hesitate to "own" this site. The culture of any entity emanates from the top. This community looses all value to me if it degrades into just another internet site full of creeps and disrespectful people. One of the things I like about my naturists activities is that everyone is so accepting and friendly. This site should be as well and I welcome you and other leadership keeping it that way. Just say'n.
Richard, thank you for posting this. I was thinking about this very thing the other day, when on FB a friend of mine and I were having a political discussion, and I hate talking politics because it can become so divisive, but he ended up calling me a stupid moron in a hurtful and angry and public way. I was hurt. I have known him for 30 years, but he chose to be a jerk. He has done this over and over and I had had enough. So I don't want that negativity in my life, so I blocked him. I am not overly sensitive, but sometimes you have to just not put up with people's crap.
I also believe people act differently on the internet than they would act in real life, because there lacks that face to face. I am respectful in life to others, yet when driving to the market the other day I was held up behind an elderly woman in my car, and I remember saying in my car (with the windows rolled up of course), "You old Fkg Bag get the hell out of my way"….she was driving really slowly and weaving slowly and just annoying me to death. In reality if she could hear me, I would never say something so rash to someone… I would be embarrased as it is rude..but because she couldn't hear me and I was by myself, its a way to relieve stress by screaming an acting like a schmuck. I think the internet is a allot like driving and the road rage that we let happen because there is not that face to face human relationship.
So now I try to just calm down behind the wheel of the car, and on the internet I try to not be offended. It's a work in progress.
As for people being rude to women, on FB and here, because it is a faceless thing happening, I think people act up because there is not that human interaction going on, so people's personal space is tested at times. I have never harrassed women. Especially being a nudist, it's like going to a club. You behave or you get booted out.
Thanks for sharing this dialogue. 🙂
Spot on! When hidden by anonymity, people turn to their baser selves and say and do things they would never do in "reality." The internet world makes people a little scary.
Often it could be the people with the wrong motives that come and join here and therefore leave comments that we don't like to see here. I've gone through the rules a few times before I commented for the first time. I also went to some great lengths to get verified as well as I don't do nude pics. But I feel that by agreeing to terms and conditions "rules" if anyone breaks them then their membership should be frozen for 24 hours like Facebook or completely kicked off.
its all the same every where. It seems to be natural. Well to use their words , F&%$ &^*m and block and kick them out. They are not willing for explanation. They are here to see some pussy and dick. This is not the site for it, there are plenty of other sites for it. Let them go to fuckbook or something. Sorry for bad language but this is how it is.
Richard, This is your site. You make the rules. You are taking it too personally. If you do not like the way a member behaves on the site or with interaction with you, give them a warning and if that doesn't work, or they behave like assholes, boot them. You certainly do not have to make apologies to anyone.
I'm trying very hard to NOT make this about my site and my rules, HB. People need to look outside of their little worlds and pick up on their behaviour, regardless of which site they're on. This is why Michaels' point was partially valid (imho). Online or offline, we are responsible for how we choose to interact with others, and the kind of behaviour we permit ourselves and others to get away with, or not. We all have our part to play in maintaining a healthy atmosphere of of fun but not abuse, debate but not rudeness, and so forth. and I was just wringing my hands a bit…
No, it is about the rules and good manners and good taste. It is not your fault these folks are rude, mean, and inconsiderate to other people. The rules are as clear as they can be, and the mods here discuss all manners of things to give posting members the benefit of the doubt. It is not your job to teach good manners and behaviour. I say, give them a fair warning first, and then boot them. I don't have time for assholes, and I hate it when I see someone being mean or unthoughtful of other people's (especially the women here) feelings. Oh, and naked people are not thick skinned because they are naked. If people want to be mean, rude and careless, let them go somewhere else.
Richard you have nailed down our thoughts as well. It seems good manners and respect have escaped several on the Naktiv site which sadly creates an uncomfortable environment for some.
It's up to us (all) to fix it, then, T&K, eh? 🙂
No Michael, that's like saying the world is a bad place, so we should all leave it. It's not really a very satisfactory solution to how we relate to one another. Online or offline.