David Lewis

Fun with depression…

December 23, 2018 in Uncategorized

Some of my older friends here may have noticed my prolonged absence from the site. The past year has been a rough one. I’ve dealt with depression for a long time, since my early teens, but never really tried to deal with it seriously. I’ve always heard the “suck it up and be a man” line, or simply “get over it.” Depression doesn’t work like that.

I’m sure there are others here dealing with the same issues and it’s not easy. People think you’re just moody or have a bad attitude. They don’t understand the background of the situation. I’ve had the same nightmares on a weekly basis since some trauma when I was a teen. I would get maybe 3-4 hours sleep per night. Once I had the dream I would sit up all night. It also caused trust issues with people and I tended to isolate myself from everyone (one of the reasons I haven’t been here for some time.)

I dropped into what seemed like a pit this past spring. My coworkers thought I was just extra cranky because of world politics or the stress of being single again. Family members just said get over it. I found it difficult to leave home. I couldn’t deal with other people, especially if they were happy and upbeat. My nephew with whom I work, noticed. I talked about buying a gun “for protection.” He’s dealt with depression and anxiety as well and knew what was going on with me. He finally confronted me and stood by my side as I finally made a doctors appointment.

He saved my life whether he realizes it or not. Talking to a professional on a regular basis combined with proper mild medications to fix a chemical imbalance has been a long process, but worth it. I feel more like a “normal” person now, no nightmares at last and it’s amazing what a full nights sleep can do! I even started dating again, finding one woman that isn’t disturbed by my habit of forgetting clothes.

If any of you are feeling like you’re trapped in a rut or always depressed, PLEASE seek help. It doesn’t hurt and you will come out a better person.

Thanks for putting up with me…and I’ll be back to birding!

Attitudes…

March 26, 2017 in Uncategorized

I just needed to vent today…
I've been single for a year now, considered myself "single" even when I was living with my last partner, she had a breakdown and I was just a care taker it seemed. Anyway, life has moved on since then.

I recently became reacquainted with a woman I knew back in high school. We both liked each other, but being teens we never said anything. She's also single now and a few similar relationships like mine. We've been talking most everyday for the past few weeks. Planning to get together soon to go birding…yes, she even likes birds.

We were talking about the lack of honesty with our past partners and how difficult that made life. I told her I was honest in the past and that sometimes seemed to cause more problems. People love to run away from reality. She appreciated that outlook…then I told her about my naturist activities. At first she said that was okay with her, but she wouldn't get involved, which I understand, it's not for everyone. Today she decided she couldn't del with me any longer because of my nudity that she now finds disturbing.

I'm sure she talked to friends who "know" all about us perverted naked people and our orgies. I have co-workers that like to tease and taunt me about being a naturist. I just don't get it. I'm the same person, whether they know or not. If I kept this a secret it would blow up eventually, but it still wouldn't change how I feel inside or my heart. I am who I am.

Why can't I just be excepted(oops, accepted!) as I am?

Thanks for letting me get this out.

Camping at last!

June 12, 2016 in Uncategorized

At long last I was finally able to use my new tent…and NOT behind my apartment this time…
I went to a very old naturist resort in Millersburg, Ohio called Alpine Resort. A very simple and rustic area in the middle of a small woodland and surrounded beyond that by farmland.

I arrived Saturday afternoon to meet my friends from the Northcoast Naturists for a day of relaxation and an Italian Feast in the evening. The temperature went to 90+f in the afternoon, a bit warm to sit and play in the sun, so we sat in the shade of a canopy and a few tall evergreens and talked. What a peaceful way to spend a day! Clothes free and worry free. If only everyday could be so open and easy.

Ellie, the proprietor, was the nicest hostess you could imagine. Ellie and a few of the residents, and Rob from NCN slaved away in the heat cooking up our feast, with a little help from items brought by our members. After this bountiful feast, we sat and socialized with the resident members and had a great evening, once again relaxed and clothing free.

After all of the food and getting up too early, I found my way to my tent at the edge of a meadow…in the dark(flashlight? Oops!)and fell into it and dozed on and off all night. The cicadas are amazingly loud when there is no others sounds around! ( http://burdzbuttz.blogspot.com/2016/06/cuckoo-for-cicadas.html ) Also during the night I heard a Great Horned Owl called and a few other birds and mammals I was too tired to identify. I awoke at a little before 5:30am to the chorus of morning birds all trying to outdo the others! The crescendo kept rising and rising and I had trouble trying to figure out who was who! Directly above my tent was a Gray Catbird singing his crazy jumble of songs and a House Wren advertising for a mate to fill the vacancy in his abode. Both of our resident species of Cuckoo were truly going cuckoo with the feasting of cicadas! Such an odd sound to hear from a bird. There were songbirds galore, owls, woodpeckers, flycatchers and flyovers of a Bald Eagle and a Red-tailed Hawk.

I finally tore myself away from the birds, had a quick shower and headed to a wonderfully filling breakfast and a little socializing. After that, it was back to the meadow to sit in the glory of nature with my true self and bask in the sounds of the birds all around. There is truly NOTHING to compare with sitting out in the cool of the early morning, feeling the sun covering and warming your body and simply listening to all that is around you.

It was hard to put clothes on to travel back home, but I am still glowing in the new friendships I have made and the feeling that I am a better and freer person without my clothes and trapping of society.

Oh, and I ended up with 29 species of birds that I could identify! Life is good.

First Night Out…

April 13, 2016 in Uncategorized

As some of you may know, last Saturday evening was my first time going to a naturist/nudist gathering. I've always been pretty comfortable in my own skin and have spent plenty of time at home in the nude and well as walking and hiking in local parks in the buff. But this was going to be a whole new experience.

Being naked in front of one or two people has been fine, even when being surprised by non-nudists while hiking. Going out to a large gathering, and I realize they all think the same as me, was going to take a little work on my part. I've always had a slight fear of being in large groups and crowds. I've done photos presentations in front of groups of twenty to fifty before, with great stress and shaking hands, but seemed to make it out with few scars and no bleeding.

This night I was going to be with a group and be naked and not worry. After driving past once not wanting to be the first to arrive, I turned around and got up the courage to dive in. I parked my car, grabbed my bag of treats to share and my backpack to put my unneeded clothes in and headed in. I was a little taken aback at first to see a number of clothed folks there…was I in the right place? Did I misunderstand the purpose of this party? Oh well…breathe…

I greeted a couple of people that were sitting by the door, introduced my self nervously to a couple more and placed my snacks on the food table…still dressed. Then I noticed a few nude and semi-nude guests and thought, enough dawdling! I found a seat, put down my towel and simply undressed. No big deal after all. AND I was sooo much more comfortable.

I introduced myself to more folks, passed out a few cards with my blog and photo info on them and met a couple of birders. They had a DJ and many were on the dance floor. Being extremely uncoordinated, I managed to avoid that part. What a great and friendly group they were. I had such a nice time that I joined the North Coast Naturists and I'm looking forward to attending more of their events…a few outdoors this summer. Oh to be outside in the sun and fresh air without worry of offending anyone!

Hey everybody…I LOVE BEING NAKED!!

Oops…I've been seen!

October 5, 2014 in Uncategorized

A little story to go with a photo I posted…

As I was walking back down this hill in the Cuyahoga Valley National Park, I was suddenly shocked to see what appeared to be a very dark colored coyote. We've seen many of these coyotes in the park before, but usually not in the day. Not too unusual for this area, but startling none the less! I stop dead in my tracks, not wanting to upset this critter, when from around the bend comes a man, fully dressed with a coat and cap, with another dog. Apparently they were shepherd-wolf hybrids, and very friendly dogs too!

All of a sudden I remembered I was in the nude and this poor man wasn't! I sort of covered my tiny bits with my sweat shorts(which I ALWAYS carry!)and said "Sorry, I thought I was the only one on the trails and there were no other cars in the area." As it was a little drizzly, I was confident no one else would be out in this weather. He chuckled a bit and said he parked in the other lot up the hill and also saw no other vehicles around…I forgot about that one. Feeling a bit awkward, I made a little conversation, not thinking that he may not have wanted to talk to a skinny naked man in the woods. I also stopped to pet the dogs…very silky and thick fur I might add. He was very polite to me, then turned and continued his walk, he could have easily been offended and made a scene. I'm sure he'll have a little laugh when he gets home and shares this story!

This was the first time anyone has ever seen me in the nude, other than doctors and my limited female and male partners, and it turned out to be no big deal. All that worrying for nothing I suppose…or I was just lucky.

I'm still giggling about it, but can't tell anyone here because they don't know or understand the love of nude hiking. So you guys have to listen to my stories now!

Thanks!
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I hate clothes…a rambling post…

September 27, 2014 in Uncategorized

I've always hated clothes. Always. Being the "accident" child as my father called me, I would get hand me down clothes that were 10 years out of style and very ill fitting.

As you may have noticed from my photos, I am not what you would call a well built individual. I was the runt of the litter. I've always been quite thin, my mother worried about me when I was young. Eventually she decided that's just the way I am.

I always thought I would grow up and get big like my friends…no, that wasn't meant to be. Physical education class in junior high was a nightmare, especially the shower scenes. My school ranged from just turned 13 like me, to 18 year old seniors. Imagine a boy that hasn't really gone through puberty, confused about sexuality and "under weight." Being naked in front of others did not help my self image.

I only took a shower twice and worked out excuses to get out of it. The teachers and coaches didn't care for me and would try to force me into activities that I just wasn't built for. Lot's of embarrassing moments for me, much to their amusement.

Luckily I made it through those classes and became an art major and no longer had to deal with phys ed class.

At that point in the late sixties, styles changed. Lucky for me, tight jeans were in style and I found one store about 30 miles away that carried pants with a 24" waist.I was saved at last! I fit in a little better with the other art students than the "normal" kids. Dressing in the hippie/mod way helped quite a bit.

I was still taunted with the skinny, skeleton, bone man, twigs, and those sorts of names, but I was growing immune to it.

Styles changed again, but I was still able to find a few things that fit fairly well. And I was still teased by coworkers about my size. I finally went though puberty, but was still a skinny 6' 1", 115 pound bean pole.

I still amazed at how rude strangers can be. I guess it's okay for folks to point out, sometimes loudly, how skinny I am. I would never do that to anyone else because I know how it feels.

People that know me like me for who I am, not how I'm built. Being with both men and women in my life has made me more comfortable with myself and more tolerant of others. I like the way I look, that's probably one of the reasons I like to post photos here, like everyone else.

I just went out to look for jeans for work. I tear through them quickly…too many sharp objects around! Hard to believe, but I've gained over 30 pounds since school. It took 40 years! Now it seems, I'm still behind the trend in America. Try finding a pair of 30 or 31 inch waist pants with a 32 inseam. Three malls later and I found TWO(!) pairs…and on sale. It's funny how even the "slim" cut jeans still look loose. Oh well. When I'm nude, my skin fits just fine.

Who needs clothes anyway?

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